Friday Funnies

[Donna_Kx]

Funny joke for today:

The oldest computer can be traced back to Adam and Eve. It was an apple but with extremely limited memory. Just 1 byte. And then everything crashed.

[Tiffany_Kx]

Lol, good wholesome funny joke!

[Tiffany_Kx]

Friday funny on Sunday! 

My family has always enjoyed Reba from her show Reba to her music.  One of my favorite episodes of Reba (circa 2000 to 2007 series) was when Melissa Peterman as Barbara Jean was a weather girl at a local TV station in Houston.  The Reba show took place in Houston.  Barbara Jean in her first weather forecast hilariously gave her audience an all out unforgettable weather performance.  I could not find a decent video.  This video says over 3 minutes, but it's only a minute and a half as they repeated this segment on the video.  My weather group name on Friend's Realm was inspired by this segment on Reba. Barbara Jean takes on the name Stormy-Clear-Weather for her viewer fans in Houston.

[Donna_Kx]

LOL that was fun. Off to find a funny for today

[Donna_Kx]

Ok here's one that's fun.

[Tiffany_Kx]

Oh, so funny and cute lol!  Dogs are pretty smart

[Tiffany_Kx]

I'm doing some accounting today, so this Mr. Bean meme works for me.

[Donna_Kx]

ROFL - yeah that Mr. Bean look is as iconic as the Lucy look.

[Donna_Kx]

This one has a few colorful words but nothing that is too bad. However, if anyone is offended, we will remove it.

A new priest at his first mass was so nervous he could hardly speak. After mass he asked the monsignor how he had done. The monsignor replied, “When I am worried about getting nervous on the pulpit, I put a glass of vodka next to the water glass. If I start to get nervous, I take a sip.”

So next Sunday he took the monsignors advice. At the beginning of the sermon, he got nervous and took a drink. He proceeded to talk up a storm. Upon his return to his office after mass, he found the following note on the door:

1. Sip the Vodka, don't gulp.
   
2. There are 10 commandments, not 12.
   
3. There are 12 disciples, not 10.
   
4. Jesus was consecrated, not constipated.
   
5. Jacob wagered his donkey, he did not bet his ass.
   
6. We do not refer to Jesus Christ as the late J.C.
   
7. The Father, Son, and Holy Ghost are not referred to as Daddy, Junior and the Spook.
   
8. David slew Goliath, he did not kick the shit out of him.
   
9. When David was hit by a rock and knocked off his donkey, don't say he was stoned off his ass.
   
10. We do not refer to the cross as the "Big T"
    
11. When Jesus broke the bread at the Last Supper he said, "Take this and eat it for it is my body." He did not say "Eat me."
    
12. The Virgin Mary is not called "Mary with the Cherry."
    
13. The recommended grace before a meal is not: Rub-A- Dub-Dub thanks for the grub, yeah God.
    
14. Next Sunday there will be a taffy pulling contest at St. Peter's, not a peter pulling contest at St. Taffy's.
    

[Tiffany_Kx]

Lol!   

I'm Catholic and this is hysterical.  It's well known that Catholic priests imbibe.